My Journal (continued) Page 6

April 1, 2000
When I was first fit with my new temporary prosthesis, I wore a #3 stump sock. Let me explain about stump socks. They come in different sizes, #1, #3, #5 and I've seen them as high as #8. What these numbers mean is 'plys'...in other words, a #3 sock would be like wearing 3 plys of socks. A #5 sock means your wearing 5 plys of socks, but in reality it's only one. (I hope I explained that well).

Beginning with a #3 sock, my prosthetist said it would take about 3-4 months for my stump to shrink enough before I would need my second temporary prosthesis. But, after 6 weeks, I was wearing 33 plys of socks and losing control of my balance and walking because of the quantity of socks I needed to wear. I surprised myself as well as my prosthetist with the amount of shrinking my stump was doing in such a short span of time. The one problem I had encountered with such fast shrinkage was that my stump incision wasn't healing. About a 1/2" area refused to heal shut. I was having to place Kerlix on the bottom of my stump to try and keep my stump socks clean, which of course only added to my problems with walking. My prosthetist told me he'd never seen a stump shrink so quickly in the 30 years he'd been doing it, so I can only say, my stump was made for stardom :-).

It was about this time that I was fit for my second prosthesis. It was a great feeling having a leg which enabled me to walk at a steady, but slow pace and fit like a glove. Of course, once again my happiness didn't last long at all.

July 7, 2000
By this time, my stump incision still hadn't healed and I was getting worried. It should have healed within a month or so after being closed, but it still had drainage from it. I was finally forced to see Dr. E. What I hadn't expected from him was another hospitalization, but it's what I got. Come to find out, because my stump had shrunk so fast, the skin on my stump hadn't had time to catch up, so every time I stepped with my prosthesis I was spreading open the incison line. Ugh!!!! The last thing I wanted was to go to the hospital. The thought of it scared me to death!! But as Dr. E explained, it would most likely be my last. With that thought in the back of my mind, I relented and this time I only spent 2 days in the hospital. I was back in my wheelchair and using my walker, but I kept thinking in no time at all I'd be back with my 'leggy' and walking again.

Within a month I was doing just that. I had returned to work, my stump had finally healed and I was on cloud nine. What I had to do was deal with my everyday life and keep learning and adjusting to doing things differently.

I was still terrified of so many things, it took time to completely adjust. When I had gotten my first temporary prosthesis, I walked with my walker and felt so secure when I used it. I never thought of ever giving up my walker because of the security blanket it gave me. But it was my husband who finally said I needed to move on. He bought me a quad cane and of course I wasn't keen on using it. The walker was my life-line to walking and to take it away was a confidence shattering thought. Again, I had to ask myself, "Are you going to use a walker the rest of your life?". I wanted to answer NO to the question, but I didn't want to give it up. I finally took the step to using my quad cane and though it scared me in the beginning, I admit it gave me so much more freedom than the walker had. If you stop and think about it, using the quad cane was much more convenient. Having to put the walker in the back seat of the car everyday was cumbersome, walking around in the kitchen from the sink to the stove to the refrigerator was a journey in itself. But using my quad cane allowed for much more flexibility in doing things. Yes, I was slow and yes I tired easily because I was using more of my body weight than I was when I was using my walker. The graduation from walker to quad cane was another stepping stone in a long journey to independence.

September, 2000
The time had come for my husband and I to realize we needed to be closer to family. We were 2,300 miles away from my family in California, and about 350 miles from his family in Ohio. With my amputation, my husband could only talk to his family and mine by phone. He needed as much support for himself as I did, but at the time I hadn't thought about what he needed. Yes, that is short-sighted on my part, and I wish I had thought about his needs, but, as the saying goes "hind sight is 20-20". It wasn't until a year later he admited to me he had come home many nights from the hospital, exhausted, frustrated and worried about me and the future. The only thing he could do was cry. It was then I realized just how important it was to have family nearby. With that thought in mind, we decided to move to Ohio.

November, 2000
Well, it took some time, but we finally made it to Ohio. We found a nice place to live, and settled into our new home. Of course. we were still faced with snow and bad weather. Here in our little neck of the woods, the usual snowfall was about 8-10 inches a year which I gleefully applauded!! My last winter in Indiana was horrible. I hated the thought of snow and ice, and the fear of falling was enough to keep by butt in the house! Of course, that was unrealistic, but that was just the beginning!

November 15th rolled around and it snowed! And it snowed! And it snowed! It didn't stop snowing for days!! OMG!! I was on the verge of panicking! By January, we had 22 inches of snow!!! UGH!!! What happened to the safe 8-10 inches???? This California girl wasn't use to driving on slippery, ice covered roads!! I wasn't use to getting stuck in a snowbank of ice and slush just getting into the driveway!! lol...lol....my husband won't let me live down the time I got us stuck there!! Took him, our son and a neighbor an hour to get us unstuck!! Of course, I was stuck in the car the whole time because I couldn't walk through the snow to the house! What a nightmare that was!

But not all was lost in November! I got my first moveable ankle! Yep! lol...lol...granted it wasn't quite as good as a real one, but it sure was better than my last temp prosthesis!

Once we got to Ohio, I was in need of another temp prosthesis. This time I went to Hanger. It was there my prosthetist and I decided on a permanent leg. I had pretty much not shrunk in the past couple of months, so there was no fear of that. And, he said if I did shrink, he'd just make another 'bucket' for me. So, off we went!

I was so excited about getting a leg with a working ankle. You have no idea!!


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